Moyashimonmon: Tales of Tales of Agriculture
by noetherSA
Summary: Kei and Sawaki go on a date and examine how their relationship has changed since Kei started living as a girl. Meanwhile, the gang discusses the utility of those "trap mode aesthetics" guides floating around. This work assumes Kei is roughly trans and tries to explore how someone like that would express themselves and how others would interpret them in a non-western culture.
1. Lookit This Chart!

To: Yuuki Kei

From: Sawaki Tadayasu

Subject: lookit this chart

Hey Kei!

I found this infographic on 2ch earlier, it looks like something you'd find interesting

Also, are you free on saturday? I think I saw a flyer about Lapin Angelique having a sale. We could go down to the mall and check it out and get lunch and stuff. It'll be fun!

-Sawaki

Attachment: onnanoko na

To: Sawaki Tadayasu

From: Yuuki Kei

Subject: Re: lookit this chart

Oooooh, I'll have to try some of this out. I've definitely heard some of that stuff before, but seeing it all laid out like that feels all motivational haha. I wonder if the professor would have any input on this... maybe there's a good way to maximize the effects or something!

The mall sounds good. I saw a super pretty dress there last time I went but all their stuff is so pricy so I couldn't get it（ i Д i ）Should we invite the rest of the gang, or just go the two of us?

From: Sawaki Tadayasu

To: Yuuki Kei

Subject: Re: Re: lookit this chart

Ah, just the two of us would be nice


	2. Saturday Morning in the Autonomous Dorm

Saturday morning, Sawaki Soemon Tadayasu woke up before Misato and Kawahama.* In the autonomous dorm, being an early riser meant getting up before 11 on a weekend. Almost all the guys at Agri-U were the sort to stay up until 4 AM playing korean mmos or getting in petty arguments about anime on 2chan or idly clicking through videos on niconico douga. At around 9, it might as well have been a crypt. Even the microbes were still sluggish and apathetic in the cool dry air of an early spring morning. The only real sign of life were the birds chirping outside.

Sawaki set up their rice cooker, sat back on his futon and checked the time on his phone. Kei had wanted to meet up around 12 so he had some time to kill before he had to get ready. At his side was a pile of light novels and manga his roommates had been trying to get him to read. A lot of them were really awful, and the ones that he liked were good for totally different reasons than what they said. They were always going on about how hot the girls in whatever series were, but he really couldn't care less. Like, it's the 21st century. All of the hentai in existence was online for free if you know where to look. If he was looking to jerk off, he'd just go do that. In his mind, if a series wasn't interesting on its own, boobs weren't gonna make it any more worth reading.

Right now he was trying to catch up on Haruhi in time for the anime adaptation everyone was so hyped up about. It was one of the few good things they'd recommended him in a while. The premise had a real Twilight Zone sorta feel to it, and he really liked the dynamic the characters had. In some ways Haruhi's band of weirdos kinda reminded him of the fermentation lab crew. Through most of middle and high school he had a pretty sparse friend group, usually just himself, Kei, and one or two other guys who they never quiiite meshed with. They both had something to hide from the world after all: Kei with her natural femininity and Sawaki with his ability. Sawaki was ecstatic to finally connect with a big group of friends and colleagues that accepted and worked with each of their idiosyncrasies. It felt good to be part of something meaningful and cooperative for once.

Sawaki hadn't gotten to hang out with Kei for a while. Professor Itsuki and had been keeping the fermentation lab crew pretty busy recently trying to figure out how to accelerate the fermentation of kiviak. He thought it was kind of interesting, but damn, why did all of the professor's interests have to smell so bad? The thought of surströmming forced its way into his brain and he almost threw up in his mouth a little. Kei had been busy too, working hard at the liquor store, like always. Apparently some big business deal was going down in town and the back room bar had been packed full of old men in suits talking about clandestine things every night for a while. They still texted back and forth and emailed a lot, but it just wasn't the same as meeting face to face.

Sawaki wondered when Kei would start taking classes again. Maybe they'd get like, a night class in a big lecture hall together, and she'd get all drowsy and stuff and fall asleep with her head on his shoulder or something. That would be nice. He could feel his pants getting a little tight, too, confirming the niceness of the scenario.

Some small part of Sawaki's mind always nagged at him when he caught himself thinking of Kei _like that_. Was it okay to think about her like that? Was thinking of her as a woman at all okay? He'd known her as a boy for most of his life after all. To his credit though, it _was_ a small part that thought like that. The two had transitioned their dynamic from two close but _mostly_ platonic guy friends to a man and a woman dancing on the edge of romance super easily. Could something that came so naturally to them really be wrong? The majority of Sawaki seemed to think not. And like, Kei seemed to adjust to being one of the girls like it had just always been that way. By the same token, it seemed weird and sorta rude to insist that she was still a man.

Click. The rice was done. Sawaki scooped himself out a bowl, pulled an egg out of the mini fridge and cracked it open over his bowl of rice. He let the egg sizzle on top of it for a moment and then vigorously stirred it in.

He kinda thought he ought to like, confess to her and maybe ask her out on a date one of these days.

Notes:

* Okay, full disclosure, I have no fucking idea where anyone in this story besides marie, kawahama and misato live. I thiiiink Sawaki lives in the dorm with those two but honestly I don't know


	3. Kei Looks Cooler Than You

Kei wondered what she was gonna wear to her date with Tadayasu. This was like, their fifth one by her count. While she respected that he probably had some reservations about being too familiar with her at first, it had been almost a year since she'd started living as a girl. She'd hoped that he'd start taking the initiative by then, you know? She knew from growing up with him that he got really shy around girls he liked, and while she found that endearing, she reeeally wished he'd invite her back to his place after a date for some ~alone time~ already, or at least have the common courtesy to stick his tongue down her throat. A girl has needs, ya know.

By now, she'd amassed a good collection of pretty sharp goth-lolita gear. She'd considered branching out into other fashion styles a couple times, but there was so much more depth in goth-loli yet to plumb. It seemed like every time she went looking for stuff there was some cutesy headpiece or a handbag, or a phone charm, or boots, or... maybe part of why the style was so all-consuming was the sheer complexity of it all. Sometimes she felt like an astronaut getting suited up when she got dressed in the morning. But hey, it looked cool as hell, and as everyone knows, looking cool is the highest moral authority.

One of these days, she wanted to try to make her own goth-loli dress. She'd seen some pictures some of her internet friends had posted of them making their own custom clothes and accessories and it seemed like a lot of fun. Maybe once she got a handle on all this liquor store business she could try. Fashion design was probably too big an enterprise to take on on top of all the other stuff she had going on, unfortunately.

Let's see, she thought, what kind of message do I want to convey today? She ran her fingers through the dresses and such in her closet. She pulled out a dress with a keyhole style chest, and considered wearing that but then she thought better of it. Don't want to seem too desperate or anything. Plus it's not like she really had anything to show off in that department anyway. At least, not yet. Maybe if she stuck to that chart Sawaki had sent her the other night she could make something happen there.

After much deliberation, she settled on an outfit that said, hey, I'm your friendly girl-next-door goth-loli and it's our fifth date, so if it's not too much trouble I'd really appreciate it if you'd push me up against a wall and open-mouth kiss me already. Come to think of it, a little desperation might have seeped through at the end there.

See, this is why Goth-loli was such a good aesthetic. You can practically write a thesis with your outfit choices if you're good enough.

She checked the time. Tadayasu was supposed to be over in like half an hour, just enough time to do her makeup really fast before he got there. Concealer over her beard shadow. Pale foundation. Black lipstick. Dark eyeliner. Light blush. Mascara. Setting spray. She checked herself out in the mirror to make sure everything came together right. She looked cool as fuck.


	4. Chapter 4

Sawaki thought about what to wear for about five seconds before pulling on a t-shirt, his Agri-U jacket, and some jeans. He hastily combed back his hair with his fingers and headed out to meet up with Kei


	5. Sad Girls Shop at Lapin Angelique

The mall was packed, because of course it was. It was a saturday afternoon in Tokyo, everyplace was packed. The duo brushed past the greeters and solicitors passing out tissues by the front entrance, waded through probably 300 people, and finally made it to that holy grail of gothic fashion: Lapin Angelique. *

Kei's face lit up and she immediately beelined over to one of the dresses on display. The store was less people-dense than the main atriums of the mall, but since everyone inside was wearing hoop skirts and puffy sleeves it didn't really make much practical difference.

"T-Tadayasu! Look at this dress, oh my god!" she pulled it off the rack and held it out in front of her. Then something else caught her eye and she pulled that off too "Aah this is so cool. Check out the silhouette! It totally screams like, 'The bourgeoisie will sell us the rope we use to hang them!' or something."

"Oh! Yeah that's really cute. I like the lace... thing... on the shoulder there" To Sawaki, everything in the store looked basically exactly the same. He was effectively fashion illiterate. "The uh, the belt stuff on the other one looks neat too."

"Oh I know, right?"

"Er, I think both of them would probably look nice on you."

"Awh, thanks. Well, I sure hope they do, at least." Kei grinned ear to ear, an odd combination with her morose style of dress.

Kei made a lap around the store picking out an armful of skirts and socks and tops and things while Sawaki followed close behind, idly commenting on her choices. He wished he had more to say then the occasional "oh that's cute" or whatever. Kei was one of his closest friends after all. It sucked not being able to connect with her on something she obviously was very passionate about. He hoped she didn't think he was uninterested.

"Come to think of it, I think I kinda need some new clothes too" Sawaki ventured, cautiously, "do you think you'd be up for heading over to Parco after this to help me pick stuff out? You're, uh, a lot better at all this than I am."

Kei looked surprised. "Oh? Yeah that could be fun! Let me try this stuff on real quick and then we can head over." she ducked behind a curtain and entered a dressing room stall.

A few minutes later, Kei emerged wearing some of the clothes she had picked out. "So? How do I look?" she flashed Sawaki an expectant grin and struck a suggestive pose, her right hand in a "victory" sign.

Sawaki tried really hard. "I like it. Uhm, I like how the belts on the dress go with the straps and stuff on your boots?"

"Ah! I thought so too. I think the bodice on this makes my waist look really good. Or I guess, it makes me look like I have one to start with." she giggled a bit. "Okay I got one more round of stuff to go through and then we can go eat or something. I'm getting pretty hungry actually." Again, she disappeared behind the curtain.

What the fuck is a bow dice? thought Sawaki, Boa dies? Boat ice? Clearly there was more to learn.

A rolled up sock tumbled out from under the curtain, and Sawaki stopped it with his shoe and picked it up.

"Shit! Uh, Tadayasu, can you get that? I'm a little indisposed right now."

Sawaki opened the curtain a bit and held out the socks, and Kei accepted them. Sawaki couldn't help but catch a glimpse of what had been going on in there. Kei had removed her wig while she was changing and her bare chest was exposed. Suddenly it hit him what he was seeing: a girl in a pretty advanced state of undress. He felt himself getting flushed and he swung the curtain closed in a jolt.

"Oh fuck, sorry!"

He heard a perplexed laugh from inside the dressing room. It started as a giggle and crescendoed into a belly laugh. Sawaki could hear Kei's voice crack a little.

"I'm really sorry for peeking! I-I-I wasn't thinki-"

"Nonono it's fine, it's fine. Not like it's anything you haven't seen before, right?" She giggled again "Still, it's kinda funny- I'm not used to having something to hide like that yet. I feel like a maligned woman in an anime or something"

"Wait is that good or bad"

"Er, It's... good, I think? I like feeling like a girl. Although, I guess we both kind of have to watch out a little more now, huh?" Much shuffling followed. "Uh, hold on another minute, this dress is... complicated." Shuffle shuffle. Shuffle

Shuffle

"Tadayasu?"

"Yeah?"

"I fucking hate this dress now."

Kei changed back into her own clothes without incident and purchased the first outfit. With the sale, it only cost 25000 yen.

Notes:

* LA was started in Shibuya in the mid 90s by the late c-tier famous musician and runway model Kawaguchi Torako and her band SEX BUNNY as a storefront for local seamstresses to sell their work. The store gained popularity during the goth-loli boom around the turn of the millennium, and it started to carry clothes from larger manufacturers. By the present day, LA carries primarily mass market goods because they are cheap and accessible to most customers while a custom made dress might cost 30000 yen or more. Kawaguchi tragically died in a car accident in 2001 and the band members broke apart to focus on other projects soon after. Kei held a midnight vigil the night after she heard.


	6. Wait, We're Dating?

Sunshine Burger: the last line of defense between hungry youths and starvation while away from home. Luckily for Sawaki and Kei, the mall they were in came equipped with not one, but two of them. Truly a feat of modern city planning.

The lunch rush was over by then and the line at the restaurant was mercifully short. The cacophony of timers going off in the kitchen and people chatting dominated the establishment, and the scent of cheap fast food wafted over them. It was familiar, and if they were to think too hard about it, that was probably pretty distressing.

"Hiwelcome to Sunshine whatcanigetforyoutoday" said the cashier, clearly not close enough to the end of his shift.

Kei stepped forward. "Hello~ Can I get a- wait, hold on. Tadayasu, you go first. I gotta think about this a little more."

"Mmkay. Can I get a, uh, a Spokane steak sandwich combo-"

"Smallmediumorlarge"

"Medium."

"Are you two paying together?"

"No, I'll pay separately." said Kei

Sawaki grinned to himself. Ha , he thought, That guy must've thought we were a couple .

"Okayhere'syourrecipt we'llbringitoutwhenit'sready." the cashier turned to face Kei. "And for you, miss?"

Kei stepped up to order again, clearly trying to fight off a grin. "Yeah, uh, can I have a charlottesville chicken sandwich?"

"Wouldyouliketomakethatacombo"

"No, thank you."

"Okayhere'syourrecipt we'llbringitoutwhenit'sready."

Sawaki spotted an open booth and sat down. Kei slid in next to him on the same side of the booth. Her shoulder pressed up against his, and a wave of comfort and satisfaction washed over him. Man , he thought, I should really ask her out on a date already . He was kinda surprised though. Usually friends sit opposite each other at restaurants, right? Wasn't this a little close, too? Was there something he wasn't getting here?

...Nah.

"Hey Tadayasu, did you hear that? He called me 'miss!'" Kei was beaming. She looked like she had just received her first compliment in her entire life.

"Does that not happen a lot?" Sawaki was surprised at the intensity of her reaction. "I mean, you look like a girl to me, at least."

"I guess the novelty hasn't worn off just yet," Kei explained, "But dealing with service workers is always a little nerve-wracking, you know? You never know if they're gonna 'sir' you and then the rest of the interaction just gets suuuper uncomfortable."

"Huh, I guess I hadn't really thought about that too much"

"Well, If you ever decide to crossdress full time, you'll run into a lot of situations you haven't thought about much," said Kei, "Oh! Speaking of, I'm probably gonna end up smudging off all of my lipstick while I'm eating, do you think you can, come with me to the bathroom afterwards so I can re-apply it? I don't want to run into any weirdos alone."

"Yeah, for sure." a beat. "Wait, don't you use the women's restroom now? How am I supposed to follow you in there ?"

"Oh. I usually use the men's toilet still. Do you think I should switch? I'm kind of scared either way."

"I mean, you are a girl, right?"

"Iunno, am I?" Kei playfully raised an eyebrow.

"Aren't you?"

"I guess probably. I'm just nervous." she leaned her head into Sawaki's shoulder. "Just come with me for now, okay?"

Sawaki's heart felt like it was gonna pound straight out of his chest. How could anyone possibly refuse a request like that?

As usual, the food arrived a little too quickly. The waitress dropped their trays off and flashed Sawaki a knowing smile before continuing on to another table.

Kei carefully removed her elbow length leather gloves, folded them up and placed them in her bag. Underneath, she had painted her nails black, because of course. They dug in.

"Don't you usually like the burgers here better?" Sawaki asked.

"I mean yeah," Kei said between bites, "but thatchart you sent me said no red meat, so I had to improvise."

"Oh yeah, what'd you think about that? I really have no idea about, like, the dietary stuff, but it sounded like something that could work."

"Yeah. I mean, the food part is probably pretty easy. I already don't eat much red meat, and I eat a ton of soy." she pulled a printout of the chart out of her purse, and looked it over for a moment. "Oh! And I guess you can help me with the semen requirement."

Sawaki almost choked on his drink. Kei, who had apparently been lying in wait for his reaction for several days, started laughing uncontrollably.

"S-semen requirement?!" Sawaki had completely forgot that was in there.

"Yeah, it says right here. 500-1000 mg a day. Think you even have that much in you?"

There were a lot of thoughts swirling around in Sawaki's mind at this moment. He knew something about how Kei had been acting today seemed fishy, and now it kinda sounded like she was propositioning him for sex. Were... were they actually a couple? Was this a date? He figured he should ask Kei herself.

"H-hey Kei, is this a date? Are we dating? I mean I really like you, like, like you like you, and I mean, uh..."

Kei stared back at him, apparently amused by the trouble he was having. "It's okay, take your time." she turned and hugged him from the side.

"Uh, I guess, if you need help with the semen requirement I'm down to uh... contribute?"

"Pfffffft HAHAHAHA" Kei started laughing again. She kissed him on the cheek. "Okay Casanova. How about we wait until we get Itsuki's take on this before we start thinking about sucking all the fluid out of your body?"

Sawaki was embarrassed. He felt like an idiot, both for not being more forward with his own attraction and being oblivious to Kei's probably incredibly obvious feelings. But at the same time, he was overjoyed to officially be on romantic terms with her... although, thinking about it more, they kinda had been for a while already.

As she predicted, Kei had smudged off most of her lipstick by the time they finished eating.

"Tadayasu, wanna hit the restroom?"

The bathroom was empty when they went in, thankfully. Sawaki had no idea what to do if someone in there noticed that Kei was... whatever she was, and tried to start something. Could he protect her? He couldn't bear the thought of his best friend getting hurt. Kei bent over the counter and stared intently into the mirror as she carefully re-applied her lipstick, and Sawaki leaned against the counter next to her.

Sawaki remembered the time she'd cold cocked him when she found out he'd seen Marie naked. You know , he thought, Kei probably wouldn't need too much help if it came down to it. But still, the thought worried him.

The door swung open and Sawaki jumped half a foot. A little kid, probably about eight, walked in, saw Kei and freaked out, presumably thinking he'd entered the wrong room. Sawaki regained his composure and explained that he had the right room. Confused, the child entered a stall and proceeded to do his thing.

This whole full time crossdressing thing must be incredibly stressful , mused Sawaki.

Notes:

The Spokane Steak Sandwich is one of Sunshine's America-themed sandwiches. It features 1/4 lb of peppered roast beef, mushrooms, a slice of swiss cheese, and a horseradish mayonnaise spread.

The Charlottesville Chicken sandwich is another of Sunshine's America-themed sandwiches. It features a fried chicken breast with a blend of spices meant to imitate a certain american fast food chain, along with lettuce and a slice of tomato. It was later renamed following the violent neo-nazi rally that took place in charlottesville in 2017.


End file.
